Aida
by Inanna
Summary: Second and last songfic from a friendly conversation I has with a friend that I also took as a writing challenge. A yuri songfic with Dorothy and Relena, also a little 1x2 and 3x4. Both Dorothy and Relena realize that we all falter, but does it matter?


Aida  
  
I do not own Gundam Wing.  
  
"Aida" by Sarah McLachlan. From her album "Surfacing" by Arista Records.   
Copyright 1997  
  
  
  
  
Dorothy plucked at her braid nervously. She played with the little satin bows   
for the ninth time in the last fifteen minutes. She shifted her stance one more time and   
then clasped her hands together, looking down to study her new shoes in the interim.  
  
That's when Quatre grabbed her hands tightly in his. She looked up at him in   
surprise.  
  
"For the love of God, Dorothy, would you stop fidgeting!" the blond haired   
boy said with exasperation. He had a crease where his brows came together and a   
small frown on his lips. She glanced over at his companion, Trowa. Trowa merely   
leaned against a pillar, arms crossed over his chest. He hadn't given Quatre's outburst   
a glance, just casually scanned the crowd below.  
  
Typical Trowa, Dorothy thought with a sigh. Completely stoic with moments   
of amazing perception. When they had picked her up at her apartments, her fidgeting   
kicked into high gear.  
  
"She would think you looked lovely if you wore a feed sack, Dorothy. You   
don't need to be nervous," Trowa murmured to her as she got into the car.   
  
That had calmed her nerves for the length of the car ride. Once they were   
inside the ballroom, with thoughts of Relena's presence being imminent, her nerves felt   
run over with sand paper once more. Quatre had suggested that they climb the steps   
and look at the crowd from the balcony.  
  
It hadn't worked.  
  
Actually, it made her more nervous.  
  
Her hands started to move towards the bows in her hair again, quite of their   
own will, within a few minutes of Quatre releasing them. She looked at them in   
frustration, clenching them into fists, and pounding them against her hips, once, then   
twice. She laid the now tingling hands against the balustrade. She could see Quatre   
out of the corner of her eye, looking at her with some concern. She choose to ignore it.   
Instead, she looked out over the mulling crowds.  
  
Jewel tones were in this year. Here was a women dressed in iridescent   
orange, another in emerald velvet, yet a third in a sheath of sapphire.  
  
"God, I hate fashion," she mumbled. She had worn a uniform from an   
erstwhile army that her father commanded. The bronze buttons glimmered along one   
side of the jacket with scarlet ribbons running across the pristine white linen. She left a   
button or two loose, revealing the scarlet underside of the jacket to view. She wore   
crisp linen trousers with a similar scarlet stripe with black patent leather shoes. She   
never wore a dress to these sort of functions. She hated dresses. The only dress that   
could find even half way tolerable had been her school uniform and she had not worn   
that in years.  
  
"What?" Quatre asked.  
  
"I said I -," Dorothy turned to him as she spoke and stopped in mid-sentence.   
At the top of the ballroom steps stood Relena on Heero's arm. Duo stood just off to   
one side.  
  
Dorothy could feel heat rush across her cheeks as she looked down at Relena.   
She's angelic, Dorothy thought.  
  
Relena wore an ivory Empire styled dress, off the shoulder with gauzy puffed   
sleeves and golden trim. A simple diamond choker banded her neck. Her hair was   
swept up into a soft French knot and adorned with baby's breath.  
  
Dorothy spied the way she lightly rested her hand on Heero's arm. She   
grasped onto it lightly, tentatively, wanting more, but getting nothing in return.  
  
Dorothy saw as Heero tried to glance back casually at Duo. Most would have   
written the exchanged glance off as acknowledgement, but she could see the passion   
and longing that ran across their faces for a brief moment, then was once again   
concealed under apathetic masks.  
  
Dorothy moved her gaze back to Relena. Had she seen the exchange?   
Perhaps not, but she had sensed it.  
  
Something twisted inside Dorothy's heart as she regarded Heero. Was it   
anger? Or perhaps envy? He had the love of both Duo and Relena. She would do   
anything to have Relena hold her in the same light as Heero.  
  
Oh Aida, dearest Aida, I do believe he's failed you, turn your love to me. Let   
me shower you with all the love and affection you need, Dorothy thought, using a pet   
name she called Relena. Relena always giggled and rewarded Dorothy with one of her   
warmest smiles when Dorothy called her by the nickname.  
  
Relena squeezed Heero's forearm gently. The man turned his attention to her.   
She smiled wanly at him.  
  
Dorothy watched Relena's lips form a question. Shall we dance? Heero   
nodded once and glide down the steps with her on his arm. Once on the dance floor,   
they bowed and curtsied politely to one another before coming together in a stately   
waltz.  
  
Dark thoughts raged within Dorothy as she watched them dance.  
  
How can you let her down like this, Heero? I know you've let her down, she   
thought grimly.  
  
Dorothy looked longingly at Relena. She was the one that had reached out to   
Dorothy through her many months of therapy. She still offered her friendship after all   
Dorothy had done. Forgave her for all the spiteful things she did. Was there for her   
when she screamed, gasped, laughed and finally cried her way though therapy. When   
the first outburst of tears came as she ran out of the office, Relena stood there, arms   
open wide, ready to catch and save Dorothy from the abyss of sorrow she had just   
fallen into. It was the day she told her therapist that shame kept her from crying and   
why. The man told her that there was nothing to be ashamed of. It was like giving her   
permission to cry. After that the floodgates were flung open, and in Relena's arms she   
cried over the loss of her father, the rejection by her mother, and the manipulations of   
her grandfather. Relena rocked her gently, stroking her hair.  
  
"There are others, here and now, who love you, Dorothy," Relena whispered   
into her hair. Dorothy sat, intoxicated by the spice of Relena's perfume. The last time   
she had felt so peaceful was when her father gave her that little crystal wave, a trinket,   
the last that he would give her.  
  
"We will always love you, always accept you, Dorothy," Relena whispered.   
Dorothy knew that the "we" meant her, Quatre and Trowa.  
  
Quatre and Trowa. They had been like a surrogate family to her. Quatre was   
open and caring. Trowa, on the other hand, was definitely a man who moved in   
mysterious ways, but at the same time oddly protective.  
  
She remembered telling them one day about how she lost her crystal trinket.  
  
She had been about nine or ten, walking along an open corridor at school. She   
played with the crystal wave her father had gotten her. She tumbled it back and forth   
in her hand. She watched the sun's rays flicker between the clearing storm clouds,   
bouncing down into the wave and splashing out as little rainbows.  
  
Suddenly, a boy stepped in front of her. She looked up at him, a bit startled.   
They stood there staring at one another for a moment. Then he struck across the jaw.   
Hard. The mottled sunlight sparkled blackly in Dorothy's vision.  
  
She stumbled back into two other boys who also just "appeared". They   
shoved her forward. Dorothy held onto her smarting jaw with one hand. The black   
spots in her vision had disappeared.  
  
She leapt forward, knocking the boy in front of her off of his feet. She tried to   
run away, but she only made it a few steps before one of the boys grabbed her by the   
hair, yanking her back off her feet. Her dress flew up and her thighs scraped against   
the cement as she slammed against it, ripping the skin from them. She tumbled off the   
sidewalk into the muddied grass, rolling to a stop on her back.  
  
The next thing she knew, a girl sat astride her. The girl was exquisite. Lovely   
honey blonde hair fell over her shoulders and she regarded Dorothy with the most   
beautiful blue eyes Dorothy had ever seen.  
  
The girl reached down and wretched the trinket out of Dorothy's hand,   
smashing it to pieces against the sidewalk. Two of the boys forced her back down as   
she struggled to fight with the girl.  
  
"Why are you doing this?" Dorothy gasped out.  
  
The girl grabbed a chunk of muddied grass. One of the boys forced her mouth   
open. The girl shoved a fistful of the earth into Dorothy's mouth and with the boy's   
help, forced her mouth shut. Dorothy swallowed, then gagged reflexively. Tears   
blotted Dorothy's cheeks.  
  
"Because, you came here, into our place, without being invited, or asking   
permission."  
  
They hit her a few more times. Dorothy threw up her arms and deflected most   
of the blows. They seemed to get bored with her and got up to leave. Not before the   
golden haired girl turned to her and said,  
  
"I hope you learned your lesson." She kicked Dorothy in the stomach,   
causing her to double over and retch.   
  
She lay in the mud for a little bit after they left, then crawled over and   
gathered up the crystals shards. They bit into her hand, but with her jaw smarting and   
the unusual warmth running along her base of her skull accompanied by a persistent   
humming, she could not feel the pain.  
  
A teacher had found her in the bathroom sometime later. She had almost   
completely cleaned herself up. The dress, however, was destroyed. She had placed the   
crystal pieces on a paper towel. She looked up at the teacher in surprise and almost   
burst into tears again.  
  
The teacher had a look of complete shock on her face. Dorothy's heart filled   
with shame. It had been her own fault, what had happened to her. All her own fault.  
  
The teacher immediately went over to Dorothy and inspected her.  
  
"Nothing that the nurse can't fix," the teacher assessed after a minute. She   
looked at the crystal shards on the paper towel. She reached over, folded the towel,   
walked over and tossed it the trash.  
  
"NO!" Dorothy screamed. She ran over and began to dig in the trash to   
retrieve the towel with the crystal.  
  
The teacher forcibly restrained her.  
  
"Stop! Stop it, Dorothy Catalonia! It's only glass! If you hadn't been   
running along with it, you wouldn't be here now and your toy smashed."  
  
Dorothy looked at the woman in amazement.  
  
"But -," she began to protest, wanting to tell her about the bullies who had   
smashed it instead.  
  
"No buts," the woman said, ungently grabbing her arm. She dragged her out   
of the restroom and to the nurse's office. She had wanted to explain what happened   
but no adult wanted to hear, except her father.  
  
"You can tell me what happened at the school when I get home, honey," the   
general had said when he spoke to her on the vidphone a few days after the incident.   
He never did make it home.  
  
After that day, she did not cry again until she went into therapy. She was too   
ashamed to cry. To cry would be having to admit that there was something desperately   
wrong with her. The thought of tears would come to her at one point or another, but   
then a deep sense of shame prevailed, drying the tears before they had formed.  
  
Dorothy hadn't realized she had been crying when she finished until Quatre   
wiped her tears away with his handkerchief. Somehow, not knowing that she was   
crying struck her as amusing and she began to laugh. Quatre gave her a puzzled smile.   
She glanced over at Trowa. He was tight-lipped as ever, but she noticed that he balled   
his hands into fists reflexively. Dorothy had a moment of anxiety, but it passed.  
  
That night when she walked into her bedroom, there was a small wrapped box   
on her bed. She sat down and picked the box up, playing with the delicate ribbon.   
What is this all about, she wondered.  
  
She untied the bow and slid the lid off the box. Laying on the cotton inside   
was a small crystal wave that fit perfectly into the palm of her hand. A note slid out of   
its hiding place under the lid. She unfolded it.  
  
"You will never need to ask permission from us or have to wait for our   
invitation. We are your friends and this will always be your home," it read. Dorothy   
recognized the handwriting.  
  
"Trowa," she whispered. She fell asleep with the crystal tightly grasped in her   
hand.  
  
Dorothy broke out of her reverie and watched as Heero and Relena danced.   
They were so fluid together, but with no feeling, as if they were two automatons   
programmed to waltz. Relena rested her chin over Heero's shoulder. The look in her   
eyes was unfocused. Dorothy knew that Relena's mind was a million miles away from   
the dance. She was fighting her conscience over Heero yet another time. Every time   
Relena fretted over Heero should would play with her father's wedding ring that she   
wore on her index finger. Now, her thumb rubbed at it as if trying to scratch an   
unreachable itch.  
  
Heero waltzed her across the dance floor in such a way that every minute or   
so, they would turn and he and Duo would exchange longing looks. Relena realized   
what Heero was doing and leaned back, giving him an injured look. Heero sighed and   
continued to waltz her along.  
  
"She doesn't understand," Trowa commented. "He tries so hard to love her in   
his way, but she still doesn't understand."  
  
The couple parted at the end of the song. Actually, Relena stepped back   
abruptly, almost as if the touch of his skin stung her. She looked about, hoping her   
actions were not noticed.  
  
Then, as if feeling Dorothy's eyes upon her, she looked up into the gallery.   
She saw Dorothy leaning over the balustrade, with her hands propped against her chin.   
Relena smiled radiantly at her and Dorothy felt the butterflies starting to flutter against   
her ribs again. Relena waved to her and she returned the wave. Relena then turned and   
said something quickly to Heero, then rushed off towards the steps leading up to the   
gallery.  
  
Heero turned his head up to the area where Dorothy, Quatre, and Trowa stood.   
He nodded to the two former pilots before turning his gaze to Dorothy. Their eyes   
locked. A silent little dialogue seemed to form between the two.  
  
'She loves me, you know,' his look said almost smugly.  
  
'No, she's loves both of us. She just doesn't realize that she can't make you   
fall in love with her,' was Dorothy's reply. 'For you, it's been Duo, always Duo.'  
  
His stare turned towards its patented iciness, Dorothy merely raised her   
eyebrow.  
  
'After all I've been through, you really THINK you can hurt me, Gundam   
Boy?' her eyes cast down to him. It was the first time she ever saw Heero bristle. It   
had only been for a second, there and gone like a non-existent breeze.  
  
She gave him one last look.  
  
'Take it easy, Heero. Let it go. She will be mine and I will love her in ways   
you never could.' As an afterthought, she turned and looked back at him.  
  
"You know I'm right," she mouthed.  
  
She watched as his pride took a direct hit. He did not love Relena, but he   
loved being with her, having a special friendship that she saved for no one else, not   
even Dorothy. Especially not Dorothy.  
  
I can love you, Relena. I am worthy of your love. Just love me back, Dorothy   
prayed.  
  
Dorothy turned toward Relena, who had walked up to them. Dorothy fought   
to keep her cheeks from crimsoning, but it was a losing battle. Relena reached over   
and gave her big hug. Dorothy was a bit startled, but her body's reaction was dynamic.   
Her heart skipped several beats and her skin went into a cold fusion, so hot she felt   
cold. Sweat glistened across the back of her neck.  
  
She returned Relena's embrace, wanting to lose herself in it. She looked over   
at Quatre and Trowa. A small smile came from Quatre and Trowa almost seemed   
happy with the match. Was that approval she saw in his eyes?  
  
"You look so beautiful tonight," Relena whispered to her.  
  
"Not as much as you, Aida," Dorothy stated simply. It was Relena's turn to   
blush. She stepped back from Dorothy's arms hesitantly.  
  
"I - well -yes, thank you, Dorothy," Relena stammered out. Dorothy bit back   
a smile. She so cute when she's surprised, Dorothy thought.  
  
They stood and talked about little things for a few minutes. Dorothy noticed   
every few moments Relena's gaze would lie on her and the former queen would smile.   
Relena tried not to look at Dorothy overly long, because a slight blush would begin to   
creep up her cheeks. Just the feel of her so close made Dorothy's heart thrum almost   
painfully in her chest. She wanted nothing more than to grab Relena and kiss her   
passionately.  
  
Relena turned her head back down to the dance floor, scanning the crowd.  
  
Dorothy felt her mood dropping away into sadness. Relena was looking for   
Heero. However much she fawned over Dorothy, Relena always seemed to be turning   
back to Heero.  
  
Relena, I can protect you, even from the one who said he would always   
protect you. He can't protect you from himself, Dorothy thought. Absentmindedly,   
she reached out and ran her fingers along the lacy gold trim of Relena's sleeve.  
  
Relena turned back towards Dorothy's reaction. She clasped the woman's   
fingers in hers.  
  
"I'll be right back. It will only be a moment. Then we can pick up where we   
left off," Relena replied with a smile. She turned and headed down the stairwell.   
Dorothy gave her back a dubious look.  
  
Sure, she'll come back, sure, Dorothy thought. With a mental sigh, she added,   
who are you kidding?  
  
Trowa interjected on her thoughts.  
  
"Go with her, Dorothy. She'll need you."  
  
She looked at him confused. He nodded his head down towards the floor, or   
rather a partially secluded alcove off the floor. She could see the silhouettes of a   
couple in a passionate embrace. Heero and Duo. Trowa must have seen them enter the   
alcove as Relena conversed with them.  
  
"Aida," Dorothy whispered. She rushed towards the stairs, giving Trowa's   
hand a squeeze of thanks as she went by.  
  
"Poor Relena, she'll be devastated," Quatre replied. Trowa moved closer to   
his lover, lightly pressing his arm against Quatre's side.  
  
"She can't hide from the truth forever. And perhaps now, she'll realize that   
there are others who desperately want to love her if she will only give them the   
chance." Quatre sighed in agreement.  
  
Relena greeted one diplomat after another as she made her way across the   
dance floor. Her eyes scanned the crowd for Heero. After a few minutes of being   
unable to locate him, her eyes scanned for Duo. Fear scrabbled up her throat from her   
stomach when she could locate neither of them.  
  
She decided to stand by an alcove, scanning the crowd one more time.  
  
"Oh, Duo." The passionate whisper struck Relena numb where she stood.   
She could see Dorothy making her across the dance floor to Relena's side.  
  
Dorothy saw Relena standing by the alcove through the crowds. The girl   
looked as if she had been slapped. She heard something. It was all beginning to fall   
into place now.  
  
"Aida, I've been empty since you left, trying to find a way to carry on. Let   
me prove my love to you, Relena." Dorothy started forcing people aside brusquely.   
She had to get to Relena as soon as possible.  
  
No, I don't want her to see me like this, Relena thought. She saw Dorothy's   
brows crease together with concern, her mouth moving, then the uniform clad girl   
started forcing her way through the crowd.  
  
No, NO! I don't want her to see me like this! Relena's mind screamed. She   
ducked into the alcove and around its corner. Running smack into Heero and Duo as   
they leaned against a pillar, kissing and caressing one another. They stood there for a   
few moments. Relena looked at Heero, feeling betrayed. Heero stared straight back   
with a look of guilt mingled with pride. Duo turned his gaze from one to the other,   
getting angrier as the moments passed. Dorothy finally made her way into the alcove   
and watched breathlessly as the scene began to unfold.  
  
"How could you?" Relena asked. A tear slipped from her eye and she caught   
it as it careened down her cheek. She looked at the moisture covering her fingertips.   
She was so shocked even her own tears looked alien to her. She looked wildly about at   
the three of them standing there.  
  
"I search myself and everyone to see where we went wrong," Relena   
stammered out.  
  
"Relena, I -- ," Heero began. There was a look of apology in his face.  
  
Gods, no, not again, Dorothy thought.  
  
No apologies were going to happen this time. Duo stepped forward to put his   
foot down. The way he did it was brutally honest.  
  
"Stop this now, Relena," he told her tersely. She turned to him as if he struck   
her. Duo continued on, "Cause there's no one left to finger, there's no one left to   
blame. There's no one left to talk to, honey and there ain't no one to buy our   
innocence. We are born innocent - believe me, we are still innocent."  
  
Relena rocked back on her heels, turning her gaze from Duo to Heero. She   
looked as if her legs were going to give out from beneath her. Dorothy walked up and   
clasped her from behind. Relena looked at her with a mixture of grief and release. She   
stared at Dorothy's face through brim filled eyes. A tear trailed down her cheek and   
Dorothy slowly brushed it away with her thumb. Relena smiled weakly at her.  
  
"It's easy, we all falter, does it matter?" Relena whispered to Dorothy.   
Dorothy knew the statement was directed towards Heero though. Dorothy closed her   
eyes for a minute and then reopened them to stare at her.  
  
"Aida," Dorothy whispered. Relena looked at Dorothy's hurt look with   
confusion and then a slow dawning of understanding.  
  
Heero walked over to them. He clasped Dorothy's hand and placed it in   
Relena's, his warm fingers covering theirs.  
  
"I thought that we could make it, but I can't change the way you feel," he   
whispered. "I leave you with your misery." Looked at Relena and squeezed their   
fingers one last time. He placed his finger under Relena's chin so that her gaze was   
turned to Dorothy's face.  
  
"She is a friend that won't betray you, Relena. She loves you dearly. She will   
protect you and cherish you all your days, if you let her, Relena."  
  
Relena looked at Dorothy with trepidation. Dorothy could feel Relena's   
breath quiver out of her.  
  
"It will be all right, Aida," Dorothy said, gently rubbing her nose against   
Relena's. "I'll pull you from your tower and take away your pain. I'll show you all   
the beauty you possess inside. If you'd only let yourself believe that we are born   
innocent. Believe me, Aida, we are still innocent."  
  
Relena sighed and said almost as an apology to Dorothy, "We all falter, does   
it matter. We are still innocent cause we are born innocent."  
  
"That's right, dearest Aida," Dorothy replied with a smile. Relena smiled at   
her and Dorothy wiped away the last of her tears. Heero and Duo had taken this time   
to quietly disappear from sight.  
  
"Come now, love. Let us show the world all the beauty you possess."   
Dorothy took her by the hand and lead her out to the dance floor. Relena leaned lightly   
against her. Dorothy could smell the subtle violet perfume Relena wore waft into the   
air between them.  
  
"I love you, Aida," Dorothy whispered down to the woman. Relena smiled   
and curled her arm across the back of Dorothy's neck. They danced like this for   
several minutes. For Dorothy, it was heavenly. Having her so close, her soft, soft skin   
just beneath her fingertips, her lips so close to her own. She was beginning to wonder   
if she had forgotten how to breathe.  
  
It's easy, Dorothy thought, we all falter, but does it matter? She studied   
Relena's face. The tears were gone now, to be replaced with a glimmer of hope.   
Relena reached up and brushed a stray lock of Dorothy's hair back. Her lips were so   
close.  
  
Dorothy pressed her lips to Relena's and Relena returned the kiss. She never   
knew how long they stood there kissing like that, though Quatre did give them some   
light ribbing later on. But for now, she held onto Relena, placing all the hopes and   
dreams for them in that one kiss.  
  
She banished the fear from her heart about any obstacles that would come   
their way, repeating to herself, but does it matter? But does it matter?  
  
  
  
  
  
Aida  
  
Aida I do believe I failed you.  
Aida I know I let you down  
Don't you know I tried so hard  
To love you in my way  
It's easy, let it go.  
  
Aida, I'm empty since you left me  
Trying to find a way to carry on  
I search myself and everyone  
To see where we went wrong  
  
'Cause there's no one left to finger  
there's no one left to blame  
there's no one left to talk to, honey  
and there ain't no one to buy our innocence  
'cause we are born innocent  
believe me Aida, we are still innocent  
it's easy, we all falter  
does it matter?  
  
Aida I thought that we could make it  
But I know I can't change the way you feel  
I leave you with your misery  
A friend who won't betray  
I pull you from your tower  
I take away your pain  
And show you all the beauty you possess  
If you'd only let yourself believe that  
We are born innocent  
Believe me Aida, we are still innocent  
'cause we are born innocent  
Aida we are still innocent  
It's easy, we all falter . . . . but does it matter?  
  
  
  
This is the second and last of two fanfic challenges that I wrote for my friend, Aimee.   
I like Heero and Relena as a couple myself. She prefers Heero and Duo as a couple. I   
asked her who she would have Relena with if Heero and Duo were together. She said   
in essence to put her with Dorothy. I viewed the conversation as a challenge, even   
though I like Heero and Relena together, could I write stories, or songfics in these   
cases, about those characters as couples? Yes, I could, though I'll admit "After the   
Fire" was a lot easier to write than this one. I hope you like this one also, Aimee. :)  



End file.
